Rain

 

I read a few weeks ago about this plot to engineer rain in Delhi to reduce level of air pollution. It made me think of the phrase about allowing yourself to feel the rain on your skin. The idea is about letting your guard down – allowing yourself to simply exist in nature without trying to protect yourself from it. What if the rain is engineered? When I step out it is not rain that envelops me but a scary mix of smoke and dust. I am preoccupied with covering as much of my skin as is conceivable. The rain they were speaking of is from a different world.

I read another quote from Adorno today, one to the effect of saying that in many of our lives, the only true moment of freedom (or happiness) is the moment of realisation that freedom (or happiness) is not our lot. That one instant of liberation, of being able to breathe out without the unbearable weight of hope, is all most people can expect. “Theirs but to do and die”. We read books and we watch movies and we hear stories about lives more fantastic, peaceful, and dignified than ours, fully aware that it does not behove us to even dream of such chance. An incredible characteristic I see of people in Delhi is that everyone knows their place. Everyone has their own share of people they will suffer disrespect from, and they will dole it out to. I think that is why everyone is so willing to take it; there is always someone below them to perpetuate the cycle of abuse. As Ambedkar said, “the class consists of the lower and lowerer” and the lower cannot combine with the lowerer for fear of losing his ‘high’ position.